It’s been an exciting few weeks for this particular writer in paradise. I got an agent, finished major changes to my work in progress (I’ll be hearing from my online critique group tomorrow), had a producer-friend option an old screenplay of mine, and watched my son graduate college and head off to DC.
New chapters beget new chapters, and in this case, it means it’s time to start a few myself. (The time may be short, however, depending on the changes my agent wants and changes my critique group recommends on two separate manuscripts.) I have a new script and a new novel I’m working on. Yay!
Not yay. Even though I have a detailed outline for the novel and a general outline for the script, I’m struggling. New beginnings means struggling to find the voice. It means barreling through small scenes that are absolutely necessary to hold the story together but are difficult to write without boring me to death. Getting the words out feels like pulling out fingernails.
Most people probably think that if you’re a writer, that you enjoy writing. Maybe other writers do. Stephen King, for instance. He writes every single day, even on Christmas. He probably really enjoys it.
I like having written. I like going quickly through a finished manuscript, recognizing the errors, and making notes in the margins about how to fix it. I especially like it when I can do that to my own manuscripts. (I’m better with other people’s.)
But the writing… those first drafts … ugh.
The story, the characters, the dialogue, the narrative – it’s never as good on paper as it is in my head. In my head are glorious paragraphs that sing my story and intrigue my readers with every word. On paper – on the screen in front of me – ugh.
Eventually I get there. My current WIP – the one with my critique group – is on draft number nine, and I have a feeling I’ll have at least two more before sending it to my agent. But the process to writing “the end” or “fade out” for the first time is just so painful.
It’s so painful that I decided to write this blog post rather than torture myself with further words, even though today is the only real day this week I could set aside to write.
Or maybe I just need a break …
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
Tuesday, May 3, 2016
Crimes Against Other Writers
A few weeks ago, I was at a writers meeting where two new members showed up. After new member #1 described her project, new member #2 came up to her and told her exactly how she should write it. It was mansplaining, writer-style! I was horrified, but I didn’t know either woman well enough to say anything.
So instead I decided to write a blog post.
Of course, this “writersplaining” example isn’t the first time I’ve seen – or been on the receiving end – of a crime committed by another writer. Maybe you’ve committed a few of them yourself! Of course, most writers are very supportive of each other, and create communities that help each other become better writers and sell more books. But sometimes, in our eagerness to help other writers, we cross the line. And, in the words of the estimable Marlo Thomas: “Sometimes help is the kind of help that helping’s all about … and sometimes the help is the kind of help … we all can do without.”
So here’s a list of that second kind of help!
1 – Stealing her story. This should be obvious, but it’s not always. If a writer shares her story with you, that doesn’t mean it’s open season on that idea. And if she shares an incident in her past that she’s not ready to write about, that doesn’t give you the okay to write about it yourself. There are a million ideas out there. Come up with your own. Don’t take anyone else’s.
2 – Telling another writer exactly how she should approach her project. Unless the writer has specifically asked for this type of guidance, keep your mouth shut. It’s her idea and her baby, so let her develop it the way she envisions it.
3 – Offering help you don’t deliver. If you’ve promised your writer friend that you’ll have her manuscript proofread in two weeks, then by God proofread that manuscript in two weeks. Side thought: Don’t make promises you can’t keep. To anyone. Ever.
4 – Mishandling a request for feedback. It is always a tricky, sticky situation when your writer friend asks for feedback and you find major things wrong in the manuscript. And yet, she wouldn’t have asked you if she thought the manuscript was perfect. (If she did think it was perfect, you need more humble writer-friends.) Here are the three ways writers hurt other writers in this process:
Pulling your punches. If you think it stinks but tell her it just needs some proofreading, you’re setting her up for a bigger fall somewhere down the line.
Telling her it stinks. Yes, I know what I said above. But a flat-out “it stinks” is crushing and doesn’t help her at all. Be specific about what doesn’t work. Make a few suggestions how those problems could be fixed. Leave her feeling excited about the aspects of the novel that do work. If you can’t do any of that, then don’t respond to requests to read your friends’ manuscripts.
Telling her to give up on it. Just because you can’t fix it, doesn’t mean she can’t.
5 – Forwarding her project to another writer. Her unpublished work should be completely under her control, and she’s the only one who decides who gets to read it. If you have a friend who could give her good feedback, let her know and let her decide whether to make that contact. But don’t send it along to anyone… even if it’s someone you both know.
6 – Telling her what to write. You have ideas. She has ideas. You write yours, and she can write hers. End of story.
7 – Badmouthing the project behind her back. So you read it and hated it. Don’t tell your mutual writer friends how horrible it was. Let them make up their own minds. Maybe they can help her, even if you couldn’t.
8 – Asking your writer-friend who has an agent to pass your work along. If she believes in your work, (and her agent represents your genre), she will ask you if she can pass it along. If she hasn’t asked, then it’s not good enough.
9 – Pestering a busy writer for notes. Some writers say yes when they should have said no. If they haven’t gotten back to you on your manuscript, take the hint. Next time, ask someone who has more time.
10. Leaving a mean review after her book’s been published. So it wasn’t your cup of tea. There are a million other writers to whom you can offer an objective critique. But if she’s your friend, sing her praises on Amazon or keep your mouth shut.
So instead I decided to write a blog post.
Of course, this “writersplaining” example isn’t the first time I’ve seen – or been on the receiving end – of a crime committed by another writer. Maybe you’ve committed a few of them yourself! Of course, most writers are very supportive of each other, and create communities that help each other become better writers and sell more books. But sometimes, in our eagerness to help other writers, we cross the line. And, in the words of the estimable Marlo Thomas: “Sometimes help is the kind of help that helping’s all about … and sometimes the help is the kind of help … we all can do without.”
So here’s a list of that second kind of help!
1 – Stealing her story. This should be obvious, but it’s not always. If a writer shares her story with you, that doesn’t mean it’s open season on that idea. And if she shares an incident in her past that she’s not ready to write about, that doesn’t give you the okay to write about it yourself. There are a million ideas out there. Come up with your own. Don’t take anyone else’s.
2 – Telling another writer exactly how she should approach her project. Unless the writer has specifically asked for this type of guidance, keep your mouth shut. It’s her idea and her baby, so let her develop it the way she envisions it.
3 – Offering help you don’t deliver. If you’ve promised your writer friend that you’ll have her manuscript proofread in two weeks, then by God proofread that manuscript in two weeks. Side thought: Don’t make promises you can’t keep. To anyone. Ever.
4 – Mishandling a request for feedback. It is always a tricky, sticky situation when your writer friend asks for feedback and you find major things wrong in the manuscript. And yet, she wouldn’t have asked you if she thought the manuscript was perfect. (If she did think it was perfect, you need more humble writer-friends.) Here are the three ways writers hurt other writers in this process:
Pulling your punches. If you think it stinks but tell her it just needs some proofreading, you’re setting her up for a bigger fall somewhere down the line.
Telling her it stinks. Yes, I know what I said above. But a flat-out “it stinks” is crushing and doesn’t help her at all. Be specific about what doesn’t work. Make a few suggestions how those problems could be fixed. Leave her feeling excited about the aspects of the novel that do work. If you can’t do any of that, then don’t respond to requests to read your friends’ manuscripts.
Telling her to give up on it. Just because you can’t fix it, doesn’t mean she can’t.
5 – Forwarding her project to another writer. Her unpublished work should be completely under her control, and she’s the only one who decides who gets to read it. If you have a friend who could give her good feedback, let her know and let her decide whether to make that contact. But don’t send it along to anyone… even if it’s someone you both know.
6 – Telling her what to write. You have ideas. She has ideas. You write yours, and she can write hers. End of story.
7 – Badmouthing the project behind her back. So you read it and hated it. Don’t tell your mutual writer friends how horrible it was. Let them make up their own minds. Maybe they can help her, even if you couldn’t.
8 – Asking your writer-friend who has an agent to pass your work along. If she believes in your work, (and her agent represents your genre), she will ask you if she can pass it along. If she hasn’t asked, then it’s not good enough.
9 – Pestering a busy writer for notes. Some writers say yes when they should have said no. If they haven’t gotten back to you on your manuscript, take the hint. Next time, ask someone who has more time.
10. Leaving a mean review after her book’s been published. So it wasn’t your cup of tea. There are a million other writers to whom you can offer an objective critique. But if she’s your friend, sing her praises on Amazon or keep your mouth shut.
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