Punch Drunk Reader

You’re driving down a local highway when up ahead of you, you see a car at the intersection preparing to make a U-turn. On the opposite side, the guy with the red light is preparing to turn right. It seems inevitable – they’re going to crash. You hit the brakes, honk your horn… and the guy making the U-turn gets the message. He holds back and watches the other car take over the space where he would have been. Accident averted. Crisis contained.

In real life, this is good news. We want to avoid accidents, minimize confrontations, remain unscathed and have a good day. And as writers, naturally we want this for our characters. We love them. We created them. They live inside our heads, like best friends who would never, ever, make out with our boyfriends underneath the bleachers while we’re in the marching band Homecoming parade.

But in fiction, the accidents happen. They have to. The best friend and boyfriend hook up. The two cars collide. The teenage girl’s pregnancy test is positive. The hurricane hits. The worst happens. It has to.

In too many unpublished manuscripts I read, however, the writer does an excellent job setting up the calamity – but then fails to follow through. The test is negative; the hurricane veers out to sea. The characters are relieved, of course… but the reader is let down. The writer has pulled her punches – set up the reader to anticipate this great clash, and then yanked away the football. The rifle stayed safely over the fireplace for the entire play.

Yawn.

Why do writers do this? There are two obvious reasons. The first is easiest to rectify:

One, the author had never intended for her book to be about how a town recovers from being hit by a tornado. She just wanted a reason for her hero and heroine to fight about whether to try to outrun the storm or hide in the basement. It was never supposed to be about the tornado!

I had a similar issue in an earlier draft of my book, KEEPING SCORE. I had a subplot in which my protagonist Shannon is faced with either losing her job or having to work fulltime. Either she’d be broke or she’d have to hire someone to drive her son all around. It was an interesting dilemma, but not what I wanted to write about. I’d also worked pretty hard setting up Shannon’s office environment and giving her an office crush, and I didn’t want to have to give that up. So Shannon found the solution of having a friend do a job share with her, so she was able to remain part time at the job that suddenly needed a fulltime worker.

It was a great solution, but it took up too much space in the book without essentially changing anything for Shannon. It was a waste of time and words. I cut the entire subplot (I did keep her job-share partner to give her more work conflict, though.).

In other words, if you’re not willing to let the hurricane hit – just like I was unwilling to write the story that would have resulted had Shannon lost her job or gone fulltime – you have to get rid of the hurricane. Your story might not need a hurricane at all, or it might just need a backstabbing best friend. Either way, the rule is the same – your set-ups need pay-offs. They don’t need to be pay-offs that neatly balance your set-ups, but something of the same weight needs to happen.

The second reason writers do this is a little more difficult to confront. That’s because the writer doesn’t want to. In real life, most of us shy away from confrontation – we apologize when we’re the ones who’ve been wronged, we pretend we’re not mad when we are. People who enjoy confrontation are called bullies. It’s the glue that keeps the social niceties moving along. In real life, it serves us well. In fiction, it causes us to pull our punches.

Bluntly stated, we make that pregnancy test negative because we just don’t want to deal with the consequences that plus sign would mean. We don’t want to destroy that nice town we created. We don’t want to break up that cute couple. We shy away from big confrontations in real life, and we shy away from them in our writing, too.

Is there a way to break this habit, other than years of extensive therapy? Frankly, I don’t know. But as a blocked writer, I was once told by a writing instructor to imagine the worst thing that could happen to my character – and then make it happen. Perhaps that exercise is a good place to start.

Being aware of the problem is the first step to solving it. Take a look at your current work in progress. Do you set up disasters, only to let your protagonist avoid them at the last minute? Think about how the story would play out if she ran into that wall at full speed. How much more engrossing would that be?

For the past several years, “The Good Wife” has been my favorite show. Now in its 5th season, the show – which was always well-reviewed – is receiving unprecedented accolades for its decision to have Alicia leave the law firm she’d called home -- and the ex-lover who’d hired her -- to start her own firm. More conservative writers might have had Alicia flirt with the idea to leave, only to stay at the end and avoid the fall-out. But that wouldn’t have given us this story.

Writers in any genre or medium cannot pull their punches. Rather, they need to leave their readers punch drunk, as blow after blow land for a direct hit. That’s the kind of work that keeps readers up all night, rather than letting them put down the book after a few chapters.

Release Day for BETWEEN BOYFRIENDS!

Happy release day, BETWEEN BOYFRIENDS! My friend Sarka-Jonae Miller originally self-published this chick lit novel, but now it’s been picked up by the publisher Booktrope. Congratulations, SJ!

About Between Boyfriends
At first glance, twenty-one-year-old Jan Weston has it all: a gorgeous boyfriend, fun friends, and wealthy parents who take care of all those pesky credit card bills.

Then her boyfriend dumps her, her friendships fall apart, and her parents cut her off. Suddenly without money, without a man, and without a plan, it's time for Jan to grow up.

Determined to get her life back on track, Jan decides it's time to make it on her own. Can she find her way as a single lady in San Diego? Can she fix her friendships, her job prospects, and her hair? And can she keep her vow that she'll never date again, even after she meets a guy who just might be perfect for her?

BETWEEN BOYFRIENDS is a sexy, hilarious story of living life, finding love, and growing up... but not necessarily in that order.

Praise for Between Boyfriends

"This book is the ultimate chick-lit read--a light-hearted romp focused on the travails of Jan, a college student dumped by her boyfriend, an SDSU student. The moment proves an epiphany, as Jan resolves to stop dating and find fulfillment as a single woman." - East County Magazine

Between Boyfriends "presents a unique twist on the chick lit genre." - Hollywood & Vine magazine

"Over the course of the book, Jan, who is in her early 20s, begins to grow as a person and even strikes up a true friendship with a man, a first for her." - Rancho Santa Fe Review

"Cut off by parents? Not got a boyfriend? That's the formula for a chick lit hit." - Indie Author Land

"The book teaches both subtle and obvious lessons about friendship, relationships, responsibility and decision making." - The Masquerade Crew

"Between Boyfriends is a delicious slice of chick-lit! Snappy dialogue sets this story apart from the pack as it follows a young woman who, financially cut off by her parents when she fails to attend school, learns that life is more than her Amex card, and reunites with a mother who has endured her own brand of pain." - Jan Moran, bestselling author

"BETWEEN BOYFRIENDS is a great read. It's got everything you'd expect in a chick-lit book: good friends, fun, and a little romance, but the thing Sarka-Jonae adds to this story is a journey." - Caroline Fardig, bestselling author

Buy Links:

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About Sárka-Jonae

Sárka-Jonae is a novelist, publicist, and journalist, among other “ists” there aren’t room for. Her novel writing career began with Between Boyfriends, an edgy chick-lit book for women who’ve been ”between boyfriends”, which is much cooler than being single.

SJ is a graduate of Syracuse University. Before writing full-time, she was a personal trainer and massage therapist, helping people tone up, slim down, and chill out. In her free time, Sárka-Jonae loves to dance in flash mobs, in music videos, on speakers, or at home in her underwear. She practices kung fu and yoga, was briefly a Buddhist nun, and travels extensively for ”research”. She’s a huge animal lover and has been vegan since 1999. She’s committed to respectfully unveiling the truth about the horrific way factory farms abuse animals. SJ lives in San Diego with two cats and two dogs.

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Happy Birthday, Girl!

Francine LaSala is celebrating the one-year anniversary of the publication of her book, “The Girl, the Gold Tooth and Everything.” Today is the last day the book is on sale for 99 cents! Buy it from Amazon here:

Mina Clark is losing her mind—or maybe it’s already gone. She isn’t quite sure. Feeling displaced in her over-priced McMansion-dotted suburban world, she is grappling not only with deep debt, a mostly absent husband, and her playground-terrorizer 3-year old Emma, but also with a significant amnesia she can’t shake—a “temporary” condition now going on several years, brought on by a traumatic event she cannot remember, and which everyone around her feels is best forgotten. A routine trip to the dentist changes everything for Mina, and suddenly she's not sure if what's happening is real, of if she's just now fully losing her mind... especially when she realizes the only person she thought she could trust is the one she fears the most.

Here’s my review from Chick Lit Central:

There will also be a Goodreads giveaway for the paperback copy running through November 8!

FRANCINE LASALA has written nonfiction on every topic imaginable, from circus freaks to sex, and edited bestselling authors of all genres. She is now actively taking on clients for manuscript evaluations, editing services, copywriting (covers, blurbs, taglines, queries, and more), website and blog creation, and developing kickass social media campaigns. The author of novels Rita Hayworth’s Shoes and The Girl, The Gold Tooth & Everything, and the creator of The “Joy Jar” Project, she lives with her husband and two daughters in New York.

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Part of the Problem

I am writing this blog post for free. This may be obvious to most of you, but in light of the recent flare-up on free writing on the internet (aka “exposure”), it may be worth repeating. Yes, you’re getting me completely for free. I don’t have a corporate sponsor; there are no ads on the right-hand side of the web site. I don’t even have an Amazon click-through. Perhaps I’m leaving a bit of money on the table, but I don’t think so.

Last week, the New York Times published this op-ed piece, which touched off a lot of debate among writers. Actually, it wasn’t debate, as the word implies arguing a few sides. No one I knew was arguing against paying writers.

By the way, I read that piece online, for free. And while I do subscribe to the Sunday dead-tree edition of the New York Times (I will never stop loving the feel of curling up on the couch on a Sunday, football on TV and sections of newsprint all around me), these days I’m getting most of my news without paying a thin dime. Thanks to Facebook likes and Twitter follows, I spent way too much time reading free news from Salon, Mother Jones, Slate, Talking Points Memo, the Daily Beast, and of course HuffPost. (And I’ve just outed myself as a gigantic liberal, but who didn’t already know that.) HuffPost is the first, biggest and most notorious of the “we don’t pay but hey, great exposure!” players, but I’m pretty sure the other publications actually pay their writers. Good for them! Sometimes I feel guilty about pressing the X on that dollar-a-year subscription offer (especially for publications that don’t take advertisements), but the guilt is fleeting.

In other words, it’s hard for me to complain too loudly about not getting paid when I’m benefitting just as much from the “don’t pay writers” system.

And I’m working really hard at not getting paid. It’s not just this blog, or the blog posts I do on other blogs, all in the name of exposure. It’s the internship I spend 10 hours a week on, reading and evaluating manuscripts, with nothing in return but a thank-you email. Or the book reviews in exchange for free books. Free books are great, but they won’t help pay the mortgage. Neither will selling my own book (buy it here!) for 99 cents. But my own Kindle is filled with 99 cent books, and I’ve put off buying books by my favorite authors because with all these freebies, I suddenly can’t stomach paying $13 for a download.

Going back a few years, I’ve written about 10 screenplays “on spec” (another word for free), and done several rewrites and original treatments “on spec” for producers. It’s hard to complain about not getting paid because they were working for free, too.

I work hard at what I do, and I’d love to bring in a salary that reflects that. But my college economics course taught me that the price of a commodity correlates with its supply, and the supply of free writing is astronomical.

What does this mean for the future of the publishing industry? While every writer starts off writing for free, the hardest working, most talented and luckiest find a way to support themselves through their stories. If this is no longer an option, will writing turn into a hobby that only the one percent can afford to indulge in?

I don’t know the answer. And I have a few more books I’m working on. But that real estate class my husband keeps pushing on me is looking more and more attractive.

50 Shades of Anything Goes

A few years ago, the publishing world was rocked by the phenomenon known as “50 Shades.” Dubbed “Mommy Porn,” the industry couldn’t stop scratching its head that female readership wanted to read explicit sex scenes.

I never read the series – I heard the writing wasn’t great – which is the same reason I never got into the Twilight series. Fifty Shades, of course, began life as fan fiction for Twihards who couldn’t wait for their celibate couple to finally get it on, and six ways to Sunday. And that impulse, dear reader, is one I could understand. I’ve been a die-hard shipper since I first saw Hawkeye and Hot Lips exchange barbs over an operating room table, and there’s nothing more satisfying than when two people you’ve wanted for years to find each other finally come together.

However, I’m going to go out in a ledge and say that reading a detailed sex scene between two or more people and/or animals to whom you were just introduced a paragraph ago isn’t necessarily the most satisfying papersex experience a reader can have.

Which brings me to events that occurred in indie publishing last week.

Not surprisingly, 50 Shades generated a title wave of “erotica” books designed to cash in on all this pent-up demand for Mommy porn. And it collided with a title wave of “indie” writers – most of whom were delighted to be able to share their stories with the world without benefit of agent and big six/four publisher, but some of whom who seemed only interested in pushing the sexual envelope as far as it will go and making as much money as possible.

Last week, Kobo Writing Life, which sells independent and traditionally published books for its own ereaders, abruptly pulled all its indie published works as a result of one of its distributors, WHSmith, doing so. WHSmith blamed certain indie titles for its decision, calling them “disgusting” and “unacceptable.”

Originally, this looked like censorship, and many in the indie writing community decried WHSmith’s, and by extension, Kobo’s, action to decide what was or was not fit to be read. But then things got more complicated. This was not the same of “60 Shades of Salmon” being pulled. These were explicit books describing gang-rapes, incest, bestiality and more. What’s worse, their authors were attempting to trick the distributor – and readers -- by uploading fake titles and using tag words that would let their descriptions come up in searches for non-erotica. They were not just trying to reach readers who wanted to be titillated; they were spamming and shocking readers in search for everyday fiction.

And sadly, they were causing other indie writers to be tarred with this same brush.

I am not a prude. I don’t think. And yet I’ve been a bit disturbed by the number of indie writers offering erotic titles. Because reviews, Facebook likes and Twitter followers are so important in publicizing our books, many indie writers form groups to help each other publicize our books. But truthfully, I don’t want anything to do with a book called “Hot and Horny Over 40;” I don’t want to read it; I don’t want to publicize it; and I don’t want to be reviewed by its author. And I’m really scared that these books and their writers are going to change the reputation of indie writers. Right now indie writers as a whole are seen as authors offering books at a lower price point that may not be quite as good or marketable as traditionally published books, but offer similar stories. It would hurt all of us if this reputation were changed to authors trafficking smut for a quick $1.99.

Again, I’m not a prude. I love a hot sex scene in a book that features well-written, multi-dimensional characters, sharp dialogue and loads of sexual tension. And I’m sure some of these books offer lots of detailed, well-written sex scenes. But if I don’t care about the characters, I don’t care about them having sex.

I don’t know how long it’s going to take Kobo to clean up this mess, and I’m angry at the writers who caused it by lying about their books’ content. For me, the bottom line is these writers are offering a completely different product and reading experience than other indie writers are. If we refuse to acknowledge that, we risk having our own books viewed with suspicion.

Working with a Critique Group, by Cristin Harber

(Please welcome Cristin Harber, an author I met last year at a writer’s conference. Cristin is an award-winning romantic suspense and military romance author. Her Titan series debuted three weeks ago with three novels and two novellas. The novels are ranked on the Amazon’s Military Romance Best Sellers list and have been applauded by reviewers as a fresh voice in romantic suspense. The first title, WINTERS HEAT, follows black ops mission gone wrong, and a couple forced together to survive. She lives outside Washington, DC with her husband, toddler, English bulldog, and has a baby on the way. She loves southern food, sings too loud along with the radio, and could spend hours reading and writing. And she has some sound advice about working with a critique group.)

Hi, Jami. Thanks for having me today to talk about critique groups.

I belong to an online group. We’re scattered across the country, but all write romance novels and agree that no one is an expert. Everyone offers something different. We focus improving our craft to meet specific goals—landing an agent, hitting a best seller list, selling to a particular publishing imprint, et cetera.

Based on my experiences, I’m sharing a couple lessons learned and tips from my crit partner adventures.

Why are critique groups so important:
• Friends and family will never be impartial. It’s the truth. At least on your first work.
• Writers can be too close to their work. It’s hard to see plot holes, word echoes, and repetitiveness. A reader who actively studies a manuscript can provide a bevy of feedback.
•Crit partners need to understand your goals and want that for you also. It helps if they are about the same level of writing. A newbie writer and a multi-published NYT bestseller won’t have much they can exchange. Crit partnerships can fail for a variety of reasons, but a few key things to watch out for include partners that:
• Don’t understand your voice
• Don’t read your genre/ sub-genre
• Try to impose their voice on your style
• Crit to make themselves feel better (RUN FOR YOUR LIFE FROM THOSE FOLKS)

Now for what makes a great team—a similar sense of style, a similar reading list. Try to find partners that:
• Bolster your confidence without blowing sunshine. The truth doesn’t have to hurt, and don’t waste your time with someone who thinks everything is incredible. The goal is to improve. Learn what your flaws are and seek solutions to improve your craft.
• Understand that your time is valuable also. Typos happen. Titanic-sized plot holes are easy to miss as an author. But it’s not fair to you to constantly be the spell checker or if you find yourself writing the same notes on each progressive chapter/book.
• Are in it for the long haul. Having someone pop in and out every few chapters doesn’t help the overall arc of the story.

Be a better crit partner by:
• Being honest. If something’s not working, don’t ignore it. If you don’t have time, be upfront.
• Sandwich criticism with praise. Example: Excellent word choice here. I think the second and third paragraphs are running long. I’m a little lost. But, I’m digging this dialogue section. Reads very conversational.”
• Respect the level of writing your partners are at and know where you are also. Offer what you know and learn from what you read.

How to find an online crit group:
• Check out professional associations like the Romance Writers of America. RWA has online and local chapters, many of which have crit groups. They also have forums where critiques can be exchanged.
• Look into yahoogroups. Several groups are genre-oriented and have varying levels of commitment.
• Search for websites that specialize in critiques. Critique Circle is an excellent crit trading website. New ones pop up, but be sure to Google them a little to make sure you aren’t accidently “publishing” your work or sharing your rights.

I hope your find a critique group that works for you! Mine is incredible and I’m lucky I get to thank those ladies every day for their help. I wish you the same success in finding your writing partners.

Cristin Harber
Romantic Suspense Author: Higher Stakes. Hotter Action.

Where to find Cristin:

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Meet chick lit author/blogger Suzy Turner!

This week I have Chick Lit/YA blogger Suzy Turner guesting on my blog. She’s written her own chick lit novel, Forever Fredless, that sounds terrific. And my book, Keeping Score, is on sale this week for 99 cents! Check it out here!

Some thoughts from Suzy before getting into her book….

Browsing on Jami's blog, I couldn't help but notice the beautiful picture at the top of the page. It could so easily have been taken just down the road from where I live. You see, for the past twenty-seven years I've lived in Portugal. It wasn't my choice, mind you (I was only ten when we moved here), but it's a lovely place to be - most of the time anyway.

It's not easy moving thousands of miles away from family and friends at such a young age but I had a good head on my shoulders (my parents always said I was ten going on twenty-one!) and I soon settled into the way of life here.

But no matter how long I stay here, I just can't bring myself to love the beach, or the sand, or the sun. I'm a Capricorn, born the day after Christmas so for me, the perfect weather is cold where I can wrap up in woolly clothes, coats, hats and boots. During the summer months I can usually be found indoors with all the shutters closed to keep out the heat. I only venture out whenever I'm forced to (okay, maybe I'm not quite that bad but close!) and I usually say no whenever I'm invited to the beach. I mean it's full of sand! It gets, like... everywhere. Bleurgh!

Seriously though, I don't mind going for a walk on the beach in the middle of winter, in my jeans and boots, on a freezing cold day. To me, that is perfect. Sigh.

Forever Fredless by Suzy Turner

SYNOPSIS

Kate Robinson has spent the past two decades yearning to find her soul mate, the boy she found and then lost during a family holiday. Shortly after her twenty-eighth birthday, however, she inherits a fortune from an old family friend and becomes something of an overnight celebrity. Can her new-found fame lead her to him after all this time?

EXCERPT

Thank God for anti-perspirant, I thought as I sat on the couch and waited for the countdown to begin. I clutched at my hands until they were white and looked across at the two people sitting opposite, both completely at ease in front of the cameras.

Five, four, three, two, one...

'Welcome back to this morning's edition of Good Morning GB,' announced Ireland Rothschild, the blonde-haired, blue eyed darling of morning TV.

'I'm here with Fergus O'Reilly and we've a special guest with us this morning. None other than Britain's love-struck multi-millionaire, Kate Robinson.

Welcome, Kate,' she said with a dazzling smile aimed more towards the camera than at me.

As my cheeks began to heat up, I was so grateful to the make-up artist, who had insisted on caking on the foundation before the show had started. In fact, I had so much make-up on that I was hoping once I'd removed it, nobody would recognise me when I headed to the airport in my now rather stupidly chosen car. I couldn't exactly blend in driving a pink Mini could I?

'Good morning,' I whispered shyly.

Fergus grinned back at me, tilting his head as if he was about to speak to a child. 'Now, tell us, Kate dear, how does it feel to never have to worry about money ever again?' he asked, his toothpaste advert teeth twinkling beneath the heat of the studio lights.

'Erm, well, I guess it's... erm, kind of... erm,' I felt so bloody stupid. Great time for my brain to stop working. 'I - erm. Great,' I nodded. 'Great, really great.' Idiot.

Ireland glanced across at her grey-haired colleague and pouted before nodding. 'Tell us how you knew this man. This,' she glanced down at the iPad on her lap and continued, 'Samuel?'

I cleared my throat and lifted my head, feeling like my brain was back in action. 'He was a very good friend of the family, some years ago,' I answered.

'Just a friend? Why did he leave you all his money and his property?' asked Fergus.

'He didn't have any family and I guess you could say that my mother and I were the closest he ever had to a family.'

'Isn't that lovely?' pouted Ireland. 'You certainly are a lucky woman. But what about your mother? Didn't she receive any of his inheritance?'

'No,' I said before swallowing hard. 'My mother lives a rather... nomadic lifestyle, in Africa. She doesn't want any of it. All she asked of me was to donate a sum to charity which, of course, I have done.'

'She lives in Africa? A nomadic lifestyle? That sounds intriguing. Perhaps we should interview her one of these days,' laughed Ireland and Fergus together.

'Have you splashed out on anything since receiving your inheritance back in June?' they asked, leaning forward eagerly awaiting my answer.

'Yes I have actually. I bought a car and a new house.'

'Well good for you, Kate. But now, most of us are curious about this boy you lost. Tell us about him?'

Oh no. Why did I agree to this?

Taking a deep breath, I knew I had no choice. Several articles had been printed since the one in Liberty; everyone wanted to know more and nobody was going to leave me alone until I told them everything.

'He was just a boy who I had a connection with when I was much, much younger. It was at Skegness. At an afternoon disco for kids. I was dancing and I felt someone touch my back and when I turned around there he was. The most beautiful boy I'd ever seen,' I said, stopping and smiling as I reminisced. ‘It was one of the happiest memories of my life.'

Sighing, I continued, 'We just looked at each other and it was like everything else just disappeared into the background. We stood staring, for what seemed like ages. I could barely move. And then, almost as soon as it had begun, my dad appeared and took me away. I couldn't do anything as we walked to the car. I looked around for the boy but he was gone. And then, just as we were driving away, I turned around in my seat and there he was. He had a daffodil in his hand. I always assumed he'd gone to pick it for me, but that's just a childish fantasy, I guess. The whole thing is probably nothing but a childish fantasy, really.'

Ireland was very carefully dabbing at her eyes with a tissue, pretending to be moved, while Fergus smiled sadly.

'What a beautiful story, Kate. I don't believe for one second that this is a childish fantasy. It's romantic and beautiful,' Ireland said.

'Now, tell us, Kate. Why did you call him Fred?' asked Fergus.

Smiling, I explained about the Right Said Fred song, just as the music began in the background.

'What a wonderful tale. Thank you, Kate, for joining us today. It's been a pleasure having you with us to share your story,' said Fergus.

'Thank you,' I whispered before the camera moved back to Ireland as she straightened her skirt and looked alluring. 'Do you remember this moment in time?'she asked. 'Are you the elusive Fred? We'd love to hear from you. You can contact us at...'

Before I could hear anything else, I was ushered off the couch and back behind the scenes where Jo stood, waiting patiently for me, with open arms.

PURCHASE LINKS

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SMASHWORDS

AUTHOR BIO

Suzy Turner has worked as a journalist, assistant editor, features editor and magazine editor. Early in 2010 however, she began writing full time and has since completed six books for young adults (the Raven Saga and The Morgan Sisters series) and one chick lit novel, Forever Fredless. Although Suzy is a Yorkshire lass at heart, she left her home town of Rotherham, UK, to move to Portugal with her family when she was ten. The Algarve continues to be her home, where she lives with her childhood sweetheart and husband of 15 years, Michael, and their two neurotic dogs and a cat who thinks she's a princess.

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